Grief & Loss

What was not reflected in unit diaries and other official records was the sense of loss experienced by those New Zealanders whose relatives, friends and comrades were never to return home. On active service soldiers would be saddened by the loss of a comrade but maintained a largely stoical approach to casualties. The requirements of military discipline, morale, and battlefield survival precluded any prolonged period of mourning.

At home, despite the numbers of dead and wounded, New Zealand’s commitment to the War remained firm. Although enthusiasm did show signs of waning, as the human costs mounted, it was hoped that the sacrifice and effort would not be in vain. Casualty lists were widely published in newspapers and the wider community soon learnt of the loss of an individual on active service. Families underwent prolonged anxiety over the welfare and well-being of kin serving overseas. The dead were buried in cemeteries overseas, leaving families and friends to contemplate their loss without a body or a funeral. Many soldiers were posted missing or had been taken prisoner, adding further distress for relatives.

The impact of loss was especially felt in smaller communities where feelings of kinship were more closely knit. After the War both government and individuals contributed to build memorials throughout towns in New Zealand to recognise the contributions of the fallen and to provide a place for those to pay their respects. Some families professed pride that a son had died in the service of King, Empire and Country. Privately, surviving diaries and letters tell of the immense grief and sadness experienced with the loss of a father, husband, brother or son. By November 1918, people in New Zealand shared the profound relief with those serving overseas that Armistice Day brought the War to a close.